Bill and Little Bill

I hate to sound like a retarded Hillary Clinton blog, but something about that woman and the interest in her fascinates me. It's like nipples on men - WHY?

Every speech and debate that she has anything to do with I can quote by heart now:

"I implore any of my critics to just take a look at everything that I've accomplished. Just look at my record, I've got the most experience at leading a country. I've been fighting the Republicans for decades and I continue to do so once I've won."

Uh huh, we've heard it all before. But how much of it really counts? We'll start at the very beginning since Obama's kindergarten class essays are important enough to shape the election.

1) She was a brownie and a girl scout. Well thank god for that.
2) Then came student council, NHS, and the debate club in high school. OoOoOh...
3) A few years later she went to Wellesley College as a political science major AND president of the Young Republicans Club
4) After a brief stint of radicalism, she wrote a big senior thesis that was later suppressed when she was First Lady. That's... Helpful...
5) Can anyone say Yale? And lots of classes in child psychology. That must be how she gets Cheney to give in, she knows which color rattles are his favorite
6) A couple law internships with radicals and communists
7) She even served as a member of the impeachment staff against Nixon. Hold-Hold on a minute, Irony is calling
8) Then there's a long period of time where she was a teacher, moved a lot, got married, more school crap, and hospital work
9) FINALLY came all of the First Lady jazz. You don't need a lick of experience to get up there, just the ability to lick. According to my book, marrying into power doesn't mean that you've earned any kind of political respect. She didn't even do a good job at it! All of the bragging about being in the White House for eight years, but it's not like she was the one under the desk in the oval office all that time, Hillary must really be awful in bed (I resisted the urge to say she sucked, but we all know that wasn't her). Oh, and most of the records of her activity there are sealed (see #4 for a pretty little pattern)
10) A million scandals later, she became a Senator for a few years, yadda yadda

...What?

Ok, I can definitely see some points that would definitely help her in such a position, but there's really nothing that jumps out at me as some incredibly strong record worth bragging over. If you're going to talk the talk, walk the walk. She's got about as much going as all the rest of the candidates, I mean come on, Dennis Kucinich was a mayor at 31. Hillary's never really led anything, so again I ask: What the Hell?

***Catch the lowdown on Obama, Edwards, Guiliani, Huckabee, and Romney soon***